Too quick time home, too much time away… has been my most recent months. Away on the boats of my safety net has been made of the last few years, the big bill payers, the retirement helper, and the peace bringer (financially) of this (at times sketchy) show-biz life.
There’s a trade off with every choice, I see it more clearly as I age, and with every time gone; as it’s been 25 years of being in comedy and calling it my LIVING, (well, because it IS my living…) My little ones aren’t little and aren’t in the house, but occasionally (mercifully) still need a chat, my friends (who were never IN the house) also need to recall that I’m still a friend, and the family left over (near and far) should always be aware (but aren’t often informed that they are) at the front of thoughts even when they’re thoughts from far away.
With all the continual goings on in the world, politics, and war (are those redundant?) and the seeking of right, or just survival, (for a very FEW those are redundant) I truly enjoy my little stage corner of the world, my escapist/vacation from troubles for the audience and am so grateful that I can find employment making people laugh.
Still the trade off of this professional choice is being gone and that’s not fun when something sad, or hard, or even happy happens, or worse when a bad that happens that turns to sad, or by missing a happy, it can be sad. On the bad parts, I cannot drive across town and fix anything, or just lend my voice to the suggestions, or to try to make it better, or when something is not to be made better, I can not help catch or wipe away the tears, and on the happy, I don’t get to hear the music of laughter. It’s admittedly one of the worse parts of my choice, and truthfully, I wish there was some comedy in that.
When I’m gone, (I mean the short term gone, not the long term “dirt nap” gone…) I hope to be better, or at least get better, at what I do when I come back and who knows, maybe someday they will pay me to be funny from home, or at least closer to home, and maybe there’s a few tears that I can wipe away, or laughter I can join in rather than produce.
I think there’s always going to be tears, it makes the laughter that we have, and that I sometime get to make, so valuable by comparison. I like the idea that you should laugh while you can, when you can, and I’ll try to get a few on the receiving end as I’m able, whether here or there…